i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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