hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize