i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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