I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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