Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
