I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Randomize
