That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize