In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Randomize
