Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize