I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
