i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
