I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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