i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize