The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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