Welp...herpes.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
