Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Randomize
