i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
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