i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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