After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
In other news, I just burned my penis
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize