everyone is single if you try hard enough
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
They took my balls.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
