also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
My ass is underappreciated
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize