? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize