Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
i dont even know how to be here
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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