doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
