so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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