whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
