I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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