I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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