If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
