i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize