some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
