we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize