This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
