did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Terrible idea I love it
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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