So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
