I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
That's intense
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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