Heybabeimwearingurpanties
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
