One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Randomize