it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Randomize
