I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
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