Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
