Please don't use social media to get back at me.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize