the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
When did angry sex become our thing?
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
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