she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize
