There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
