I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
