if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Randomize
