You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
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