oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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