But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I'm getting married
To pizza
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
