We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize
